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MATCH WEEK 33: EXPERIMENTALS TAKE TOTW
Well despite fighting for their lives at the bottom of the Nightmare Premier League, The ExperiMentals move level with our big two for Team of the Week trophies as Cameron Patrick takes her fourth with 95 points. An inspired Captain Joker saw Moises Caicedo bring in 46 points with 23 doubled. 1 point for playing, 3 points for conceding three goals, 3 for Chelsea failing to score, 4 for a 5/10 performance rating and a big 12 for a Nightmare Gift. More on Cameron's fight for Premier League survival later.

Jonathan Andrews goes back top of the Overall League with a solid though uninspiring 57, with Matt Woodmansey scoring 44.
ROUND THE LEAGUES
So Jonathan bounces straight back to top spot at Matt's expense. The big gap between 2nd and 3rd remains, with Colette Anthony equaling Matt's 44. Eloise Willingham returns to form and is up two to 4th, though at the price of a Captain Joker. At the bottom, Gary Pearson is clearly doomed. I'd have said the same about Colette and her ExperiMentals a couple of weeks back, but this week alone Colette took 65 points off the gap between the Mentals and the safety of 7th, with 105 points to make up.

Chris Bounds still leads the way in the Nightmare Championship with a 44 point cushion. Boundsy's captain Kyle Walker-Peters finally got the nod ahead of Wan-Bissaka for West Ham this week, and promptly knocked -8 off Looking Through A Glass O’Nien's score, but with other boys on form the Onions still had a half-decent week. For once they had a full 11 in play, and even a sub that played in O'Nien himself with -3. 2nd and 3rd swap places yet again, Paul Willingham up to 2nd and Liam Oliver 3rd. Reviewing positional changes (or lack of them) over the last 10 weeks or so, you'd think Chris is cruising to the title while Paul and Liam battle it out for 2nd. No such thing - from Liam in 3rd there is just a 12 point gap to 5th, and only 37 to 6th. Genuinely, Garry Simpson in 6th could yet easily win this League. At the foot, David Smith is just 5 from catching Frodo Willingham above the drop-line, gaining 23 this week.

Andrew White continues to lead Nightmare League One, but Patrick Reilly gained 28 this week and the gap is back down to 16.
UPCOMING MATCH WEEKS
OK so while certain other 'fantasy' competitions have a double Gameweek followed by a blank Gameweek on the horizon, that's not the case for Nightmare Soccer. There's really no need. It does mean, however, that here will be a super-quick turnaround between our Match Week 34 and Match Week 35...

Match Week 33

Fri 10/04 - Mon 13/04

Match Week 34

Sat 18/04 - Mon 20/04

Match Week 35

Tue 21/04 - Mon 27/04
LEAGUE TABLES
DivisionLeadersManagerPointsThis
Nightmare Premier LeagueMr MagooJonathan Andrews209457
Nightmare ChampionshipLooking Through A Glass O’NienChris Bounds191659
Nightmare League OneSwifferAndrew White176259
TOP TEAMS - this week
TeamManagerPoints
The ExperiMentalsCameron Patrick95
Toffee CottagePatrick Reilly87
Another Fyne MessKeith Fyne84
Traitors and SurvivorsEloise Willingham80
Blackheart Brewery FCGarry Simpson71
   
TOP NIGHTMARES - this week
PlayerTeamPoints
Lisandro MartinezMAN UNITED24
Moises CaicedoCHELSEA23
Jordan PickfordEVERTON18
Joao GomesWOLVES17
MurilloNOTT'M FOREST16
TOP NIGHTMARES
PlayerTeamPointsThis
Maxime EsteveBURNLEY22112
Sander BergeFULHAM2048
Kyle WalkerBURNLEY2024
Martin DubravkaBURNLEY2027
AndreWOLVES19615
Lesley UgochukwuBURNLEY19312
Josh LaurentBURNLEY190
Jorgen Strand LarsenCRYSTAL P.18710
Joao GomesWOLVES18217
FlorentinoBURNLEY1819
   
WORST NIGHTMARES
PlayerTeamPointsThis
Walter BenitezCRYSTAL P.-7
Tom EdozieWOLVES-21
Callum OlusesiTOTTENHAM0
Sasa KalajdzicWOLVES0
Jamaldeen Jimoh-AlobaASTON V.0
TOP NIGHTMARES - BY RATING
PlayerTeamAve. rating
John VictorNOTT'M FOREST5.40
Altay BayindirMAN UNITED5.50
Tyrique GeorgeEVERTON5.50
Fer LopezWOLVES5.50
Conor GallagherTOTTENHAM5.67
Daniel JamesLEEDS5.67
Romaine Mundle.OUT FOR SEASON5.75
Hee Chan HwangWOLVES5.76
Leon BaileyASTON V.5.78
Taiwo AwoniyiNOTT'M FOREST5.80
   
WORST NIGHTMARES - BY RATING
PlayerTeamAve. rating
Bruno FernandesMAN UNITED7.52
Erling HaalandMAN CITY7.45
Declan RiceARSENAL7.33
Jeremy DokuMAN CITY7.28
GabrielARSENAL7.20
Bukayo SakaARSENAL7.19
Phil FodenMAN CITY7.14
Patrick DorguMAN UNITED7.13
Rayan CherkiMAN CITY7.11
James GarnerEVERTON7.09
Dominik SzoboszlaiLIVERPOOL7.07
Boubacar KamaraASTON V.7.06
Marc GuehiMAN CITY7.03
Antoine SemenyoMAN CITY7.03
Elliot AndersonNOTT'M FOREST7.03

Players must have played 23 minutes or more in at least three matches to appear in the Player Ratings charts.
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